Recently, I was reading a book written by Gary Chapman called the five love languages where he summarized his 30 years experience as a marital relations counselor… However, it inspired me to write this article thought its ideas don’t represent the book’s concept, but I found an urge to write it So how do you love yourself using the 5 love languages?

About the book:

The 5 love languages is based on its writer theory which consider that each one of us speaks its own love language, just like he speaks his native language (like English, Arabic, French…). So in order for a person to be able to maintain his marital relationship, he must discover and understand his partner’s love language then to communicate with him using this language and so for his partner. Chapman concluded in his book that there are 5 major love languages and from there, many different dialects branch out. And the 5 love languages are

• Words of affirmation
• Quality time
• Acts of service
• Receiving gifts
• Physical touch

How to love yourself using the five love languages?

Words of affirmation

• Always remember that words are important. And that your mind and your unconscious is affected by the way you talk to yourself. Which itself has a big impact on your life positively or negatively . So choose your words wisely! Make sure to always communicate with yourself in an optimistic way and stay away of negativity and overthinking.
• Write on small pieces of paper some motivational affirmations for example:” I got this!” or ” I am pretty, strong, loved, smart…”. Then put them in a jar and make sure to pick one affirmation a day from that jar and start your day by reading it out loud many times.
• Look at yourself in the mirror and try to comfort her saying stuff like :” I know that what you are going through isn’t easy and I believe that you are doing great trying your best . I really appreciate your effort and understand your pain but you still have to go on…”
• Compliment yourself out loud whenever you achieve something even it was a small achievement.
• Put a list of things that you are grateful to have in your life for example: I am grateful for having a supportive family/friends/partner. I am grateful for being able to work and follow my dreams… “

Quality time

• Spend more time in nature whether it was going in a walk or taking a nap below a tree.
• Do your favorite activities and discover some new interests .
• Spend time with people whom you love and feel happiness around them or even spend some time with your pets!
• Have some rest where you can spend some time in bed watching your favorite shows after a long day of working hard.
• Make time to remember your past and everything that made you who you are today. Then put some plans to invest in yourself and making your life better.

Receiving gifts

• Make yourself your favorite meals and dishes and enjoy them.
• Reward your effort by buying a product that you wished to have for a long time like clothes, jewelries, decoration…
• Write a list of what you wish to buy or have so you can motivate yourself working to have it .
• Buy some plants or adopt animals (if you have time) take care of them and grow together.
• There are some people who enjoy making handmade gifts for others . If you were one of them, making these gifts would make you feel joy and satisfied.

Acts of service

• Plan your daily life to benefit from your time completely so you can draw a schedule and hang it in your room or put it on the freezer. Where this schedule contains what you decided to do from the moment you wake up until you sleep.
• Write a list of the least preferred tasks to do and you keep procrastinating whenever you try to do them like( cleaning, doing homework , attending some social events…) and put it in front of you most of the time ant try to achieve some tasks once a time .
• Don’t forget to take care of yourself and gain some healthy habits (eating healthy, having a skin care routine …).
• And just like we mentioned before, there are many people who enjoy doing some tasks like cleaning, taking care of kids … ). If your were one of these people, then making these activities would make you feel relaxed and satisfied.
• Ask for help when you need it ! Now this advice is really important yet we see a lot of people who ignore it . You should always remember that asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s really important to do so when we face some kind of problems before they get way bigger and make us feel overwhelmed.

Physical touch

• Enjoy a warm and relaxing shower or maybe try a massage session.
• Practice Yoga to start your day with a mindful clarity .
• Buy or make yourself a comfy cozy blanket.
• Hug your close people like family members or partner or even pets whenever you feel like you need this cozy contact.

And that was our post for today, I hope you enjoyed reading it.
So what is your favorite love language toward yourselves? Please feel free to share you experiences and opinions in the comments below.

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/23878688-the-5-love-languages